Dooce (like I need to link it) had an interesting post the other day asking readers about their regrets. I didn't post a reply, but it got me started on the notion of what I regret and what I don't.
I generally second-guess myself a lot. It's a weakness, or perhaps part of my Gemini nature, that I can't just DO something and let it go. I've done lots of things I regret, and I really doubt people who say that they live life with none. I think they're either hopelessly self-involved and not concerned with the effect their actions have on others, or they're lying. Or, worse yet, never taken a risk.
However, I have been thinking of things I don't regret, that if given the chance knowing what I know now I'd still do, no matter how it turned out in the end. Here are some:
* Blowing much of what I earned in my high school job on a trip to Europe.
* Fooling around with him. And him, and him. Oh, yeah, and those two guys too.
* Choosing the right major.
* Refraining from telling off my bitchy former boss when I had the chance. Leaving with dignity matters.
* Moving almost everywhere I did. Even this old house, with its questionable roof, teensy kitchen, spiders in the basement and drafty windows.
* Picking up that clawing, squeaky, swaybacked, bowlegged, cross-eyed kitten and saying "Sure, I'll take him."
* Maybe I should have given you my unbidden opinion of what you were about to do and maybe you wouldn't have made the mistake. I didn't, and it means I get to be there for you if I do turn out to be right. And if I turn out to be wrong.
* Responding when you reached out, even if I since haven't been as good about keeping up our rekindled friendship. I missed you, too.
* Actually shutting my enormous cakehole when I realized the only good of what I was about to say would be unburdening myself and taking you down a peg or two. Most people regret the things they don't do more than the things they did, and many of my regrets are that sort. But sometimes, it feels right to take the kindest path even though the other person will never know what you DON'T say.
* Therapy. And Wellbutrin.
* Smoking my last cigarette in July of 2003. Chickening out when I tried to bum one nine months later, because little did I know I was pregnant then.
* Sleep training.
* Getting in your truck to go to that bar even though I barely knew you. Almost ten years, one house, one baby and three pets later, I'm glad I listened to my instinct that you were not in fact a psycho.
* Keeping the friends I've kept.
That's quite a few things, more than I thought. Any of my friendly commenters want to share some of their non-regrets?